When it comes to working with Lilith, she can be…demanding. Even this is putting it lightly. This is the only warning you will get ahead of this ritual.
I knew going into this month she was going to push me past my comfort zone. Which is saying something. Very little, after 3 decades a Witch, makes me squirm.
Working the ritual. What you need:
Your BSC for the month
Lilith incense we created for the BSC
Our Mantra to Lilith found on the DGC FB page
A bath oil/tea/flowers that makes you feel sensual and sexy. More about that below if you’re stuck for what to use
At least 2 candles (one red, one black. Though 2 of each is better)
Finely ground Dragon’s Blood Resin (optional)
An hour of time just for you
To do this ritual, which is really one of self-love, you need an hour of alone time. I know it can seem almost impossible, given commitments to kids, husbands/wives/partners, pets, household, and the list goes on. We can make excuses for why we can’t do these things. Yet, to fully claim our sovereignty, we must make sacrifices. If you have to do this at midnight, then do so.
Start by lighting your BSC to Lilith. If you have a bit of Dragon’s Blood Resin, make a paste from it using a drop of moon blessed water.
Light a bit of incense from our monthly blend. Dip your finger in your Resin paste and draw a line from your forehead down to the tip of your nose. Continue on from the lower lip to chin.
Use the Mantra, written by Kaycee. Repeat it as many times as necessary until your inhibitions fade. This ritual is about connecting with your body and what she needs.
If you have been seated to this point, stand. Put on a song or two that makes you feel sensual, desirable to yourself. The only rule for this ritual is that it is about you & Lilith, in her guise of the Whore of Babylon. Guess what? That isn’t something to make you feel bad, negative, ashamed or embarrassed. Those feelings are the patriarchy speaking. Push through it.
Dance to the music. Sway your hips. Just fucking move. Find that rhythm in that space.
If you are able to, undress. Otherwise, extinguish your BSC and move into your bathing sanctuary to do so. Place your candles either on the bathroom counter and light them. Or if you are able, at the 4 corners of your bath tub. Adjust accordingly if you only have a shower or can’t get into the tub.
As you fill the tub, add the bath oil/tea/flowers to the water. I generally start with a base oil and add any of the following:
Vanilla, Jasmine, Rose, Hibiscus, Violet
Add them all if you’d like. Though I can’t guarantee what it will smell like in the end.
If you are able to, while the water is filling, lower the lights. I love bathing in almost complete darkness with a small string of LED lights for ambiance (and so I don’t kill myself when I step out).
If you were unable to completely undress before, do so now. From this moment, it is you, only you, and the wisdom of Lilith. Allow your mind to wander. Using your hands to push the water up over your body. Your hands connecting with skin.
What brings pleasure to you?
How does it feel when you touch there?
What about with more pressure? Less?
Find the spaces between that make your toes curl.
That has you vocalizing without conscious thought. It just happens.
As you explore her (meaning yourself), find the places where you are completely lost. Thought doesn’t come. It’s just you & the embodiment of pleasure, nothing more. Those noises? You know the ones. They are perfectly normal. Do not try to silence them.
Stay in that place for as long as you need to. Don’t rush yourself. Also know if it brings you pleasure, there is NOTHING wrong with it.
This is about a trifecta of knowing yourself, your pleasure, and beginning to learn exactly what you need. This is how we find that space I call Divine Bliss. If you’ve never experienced a true orgasm, true release, you’re in for a surprise.
It is in being open and honest with ourselves that we find this place that I can hardly describe. But it has, more than once, had me in a space of wave after wave for hours. Yes, it IS possible. Not every time, because none of us would ever leave there.
Once you feel that you are satiated, emerge from your sacred time of self. Having a lotion, body oil, etc. that helps you feel that self-love can make a huge difference here. If it IS bedtime, a bit of lavender & vanilla is a beautiful combination to use. Make sure to wash the resin from your face, as well.
A brand new pair of Pjs, or your favorite ones, clean sheets, and that relaxed place will make for the best sleep of your life. Blow out your candles before heading to the bedroom, please.
Working through what you’ve learned.
Having a dream journal, to record anything that sticks out in your dreams will help with processing. Take a bit of time over the next several days to sit with your experience.
Next, comes an incredibly important part to this whole process. Communication. We often keep our wants and desires to ourselves. Letting our partners “take the lead”. We aren’t doing that anymore, at least, not all the time.
Being a sovereign being is about claiming those things that are ours. The things we want in our lives. You can keep your discoveries to yourself if that’s what you choose to do. However, sharing what you’ve learned about yourself can be an act of intimacy, too.
Lilith is going to nudge you forward. She is going to keep reminding you that your pleasure is just as important as your partners. I know women who have faked it every single time. Do you know what takes less effort? Switching off the brain and letting go. Go claim what is rightfully yours, Witch!
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